I’ve become a bit of a wuss lately.I’m way more cautious and nervous about things I never would have thought twice about before this pregnancy. Like, should I cross the street now even though the orange standing man is steady on the cross walk and the next car coming down the street is 3 stop lights away – what if my sense of distance is off and I misjudge how fast the car is really going?
Should I have an apple now because that’s what I’m in the mood for or should I have a well-rounded balanced meal, because that’s what I’m told I should do?
Maybe I shouldn’t be walking on those subway grates or metal doors that go to who knows where underneath stores – what if after all these years of walking on them I fall in?
The other day, crossing the street, Roman and I both had the same hesitation. I laughed at how pathetic we were and so did he, but then he said rather seriously, “it’s just that now we have too much to lose”.
That got me thinking: Do we have too much to lose now just because I’m pregnant and we’re going to have a baby that’s more precious than our own lives or did we always have so much to lose, but never thought about it until now? So, I started making a mental list of all the things I had before this pregnancy that are too much to lose. I’ll share it with you…
1. Roman, who I love with not just my whole heart, but every cell of my body. I can’t imagine life without him.
2. Our home that we decorated together, and already in just two and a half years has way too many memories to count.
3. My mom who would build me wings if I told her I wanted to fly.
4. My sister who would fly right beside me just because I wanted her to.
5. Billiam and Ozzie, the 2 best dogs that I could have asked for and who have taught me so much about discipline, love, affection, taking care of something, determination, and balance.
6. My friends who I know are there for me whenever and if ever I need them.
7. My passion for life and the willingness to live on my own terms.
8. My clients who have impacted my life as much as I hope I’ve impacted theirs.
And the list goes on and on…
I always knew I had these things, but I never really THOUGHT about it. And that got me thinking about even deeper things.
When you’re struggling with something you think you’re never going to get through and never figure your way out, you tend to see the world as black and white. Things are either amazing or they are the worst they could be. You feel stuck, and it’s easy not to realize all the things in between that black and white that you need to be thankful for. Things that are there even if you’re too fat, too thin, struggling with emotional eating, not being where you expected to be in your career, fighting with your family, and feeling like you’ll never get to a happy place. The thing is though, you have to not just selectively see the bad, but you have to selectively see the good that is there too.
If you just realize all the things you have to lose you’ll realize that your happy place is already right here. You just need to recognize it.
Now it’s your turn – Make list of all the things in your life that would be too much to lose.