Half-Marathon #3 – Double Victory!

I am happy to say that I did not pee in my pants yesterday. And that proves that if you put your mind to it you can do anything.

By mile 3 I had to pee like crazy, and with 10.1 (can t forget the .1!) miles to go my goal wasn t to cross the finish line, it was to not pee my pants. And if you ve ever been with me when I realize I need to pee you d know what a feat of sheer will power that is! And woo-hoo, I did it!!

Seriously, I have a bladder like my little Staffordshire Bull Terrier, Ozzie. If you get him too excited, or you startle him, or you say his name he will simply pee right there, where he (and unfortunately, sometimes your foot) is standing. For example, take the time I came home with my friend Michelle and realized at my front door that I had to pee, but couldn t take the anticipation of getting to the bathroom and found myself leaking onto the floor in the hallway. For real, I had the key in the door, but couldn t get myself together! It was just me, Michelle, and a puddle on the floor that was oddly enough, hilarious. I could have stopped at any one of the porta-potties along the way yesterday, but that would mean that I wouldn t have shaved 35 MINUTES off of my previous race time!

Yup! After 2 hours and 10 minutes I crossed that finish line like a champ! It was a pretty emotional run for me, because I d been raising money for the Multiple Myeloma Research Foundation in honor of my father-in-law who s battling this incurable cancer. There isn t much I can say or do to make things better or right, so I did what I could. And I have so many people to thank for helping me not just reach my goal, but to overflow it by 258%! My goal was to raise $1,000, but with everyone’s help I managed to bring the total to $2,588!

Crossing that finish line wasn t my victory alone, it was a victory dedicated to my father-in-law who is proof of what it is to battle something so much stronger than you with dignity, pride, and courage. There isn t a time that I see him that he isn t positive, smiling, and asking how you are, as if you re the important one in the room. Training for a half-marathon isn t as much of a battle of physical proportions as much as it is mental. You have to be determined and driven to keep up the training when you don t want to, you have to be strong enough not to give into your excuses, and you have to quiet those voices down when they tell you to quit. My father-in-law is battling this cancer like an athlete and is all the inspiration that I need to keep on going.

The thing I ve learned most this time around is run because you can. Until you can’t you have no idea how lucky you are.
It s as simple as that.

I have 3 clients that are working their way towards 5 and 10k races and I’m going to be running a workshop for anyone who thinks they re not runners, but want to prove to themselves what they re made of. If you re interested and want to sign up for this workshop in Prospect Park, send me a line! I promise, you will never be the same after you cross that finish line!

Before I go, I know I told him before, but I have to say it here Roman, you are the one who makes my running possible. Without you I would have no one to share it with and no one to support me when I need to complain about it. You always listen about my runs as if I never spoke about it before, and you always act as if my achievements are yours. And they are, because without you I would be someone else. You rub my legs when they are sore and you effortlessly follow me to my races and get from the start line, to the mid-line, to the finish line, just so that I will have someone supporting me along the way. I love you more than you know and can t believe how lucky a girl can be.

And Mommy, I know it wasn t easy coming out yesterday morning in the freezing cold when you had so much to do, but you know, that for many reasons, my crossing that finish line will never get old, because that victory is as much yours as it is mine.

The Multiple Myeloma Research Foundation is still accepting donations, so please take a second and visit my page here. Nothing is ever too small and is more appreciated more than you know.

My 2 Secrets To Success

After 3 weeks of not being sure whether I’d race or not, I ended up running the Brooklyn Half Marathon this past weekend. For any of you following my blog you’ve probably read about my journey through my first race about 8 weeks ago. It was intense and so gratifying, which is why this time I was shocked that I wasn’t sure if I would end up running or not. I had a really rough run one of the weeks and I began beating myself up about it, which made me decide that I’m not running for the right reasons any more and should probably back out. If I’m not running for me and I’m running out of guilt, because I will be disappointed in myself if I don’t do it, then I shouldn’t be running. So for 3 weeks I laid off the running and focused on other things like Spinning and pole dancing.

But then an interesting thing happened… I missed training! Those 3 weeks of going easy on myself made me WANT to do it again for ME. I guess I just needed some time to relax about it and have the choice again. So, secret #1 is that if you’re not enjoying what you’re doing anymore than change your course. Don’t be hard on yourself by putting so much pressure on things, and give yourself the permission to breath.

I was so excited when I picked up my race number on Thursday. I still gave myself some leeway though and said that I’m not going to make my decision until the night before the race and that if I WANT to run then I will, but I don’t HAVE to.

I only have 2 things that I want to accomplish during a race, and it doesn’t include a personal best time. It’s that I run the entire course without any walking and that I finish with a smile. I hadn’t done any real training in 3 weeks though, so I wasn’t sure if I was actually going to be able to complete the run or not. This made me kind of nervous, but I knew that if I let the thought of not being able to do it get into my mind then for sure I wouldn’t be able to do it and I would have a really difficult run. So, instead I just played up the excitement and thought of the finish line and that amazing rush of excitement that poured through me when I crossed it at my first race. It is so unbelievably emotional and fantastic. If you’ve ever worked really hard at something then you know what I mean.

When I woke up at 5am the morning of the race I was so fired up! I was so ready and couldn’t wait to start running. And by the way, I had an awesome run and finished really strongly with a smile.
So, secret #2 is to never ever let those negative thoughts inside your head. The only way to really conquer yourself is keep on pushing through and keep your eyes on the finish line.

I'm the one in the striped tank

Have a question that needs answering? Send ‘em in! Every Thursday I’ll be answering a new question, and it might just be yours!

2 Hours and 20 Minutes!

Exhilarating. One word doesn’t do yesterday justice, but if I had to pick one to sum up my first ever race experience that would be it. After 3 months and 184.5 miles of rigorous training, building up strength, endurance, and mental stamina the day was finally here. On only 3 hours of sleep I ran from start to finish and ran all 13.1 miles in what was my best run yet. It must have been the adrenaline, because I didn’t feel tired or out of breath once, not even up the steep hills in Central Park, which is surprising, because for 4 weeks I’ve had agonizing pains searing through my legs. And if you remember from my earlier post I had a horrible run this past Monday which left me really nervous and upset because I thought I wouldn’t be able to finish the race. I did finish though and I finished strong! Plus, I’m not nearly as sore as I have been in the past after my long runs. Well, that’s aside from the 2 massive bloody blisters that popped all over my sneakers (but I didn’t even notice that pain either until I got home and even that’s not getting me down). Amazing!

Adrenaline is a crazy thing. Since picking up my bib number this past Thursday I’ve been as excited as a little kid counting down the days till Disney World. The anticipation just kept building and building and I couldn’t wait. But when I woke up yesterday morning at 5am an interesting thing happened and if I didn’t know better I would say that I was certifiably crazy. One second I was shaking out of nervousness and the next I was buzzing with happiness. I was literally kookoo. Adrenaline is like a drug and it takes over your body forcing it to do things that you’re not telling it to do. My heart was racing, my emotions were erratic and I was happy, nervous, and a bit sad all at the same time. Why sad? Because I didn’t want this experience to end. It was a major milestone for me to run my first race and once it was over I could never have it back. Of course this moment was going to come though and once I was at the start line all my pent-up nervousness disappeared and excitement rushed through my body. Have you ever heard a song that starts off slow and then climaxes? Something about the rhythm propels you into motion and your heart skips a beat and you feel inspired? That’s exactly what I felt at that moment, but there was no music. I knew that I would finish and I knew that it was going to be an amazing run.

Being part of the racing community feels incredible. Racers filled the 6 train on their way uptown and it was so cool to feel connected to a bunch of strangers on a NYC subway. Normally you ride the train and are completely anonymous to everyone else, but yesterday we all were linked together by one thing that we all had in common. All of us, wearing our bib numbers on our shirts and orange tags on our sneakers, carrying the same clear plastic bags for our valuables, fueling up for the run, and on our way to 97th St. were joined for this moment. There were so many of us, that if you were standing on 95th street when we exited the station you would think that it looked like a bunch of ants coming out of a hole.

I must tell you though, I never want to eat another freaking jelly bean again! If you’re not a runner (yet :) ) I’ll explain… There are food products specifically designed for endurance sports. They contain simple sugars and electrolytes that break down easily, so that you can quickly refuel your muscles when you’re exercising for long periods of time. They come in various forms, such as gummies, gels, drinks, and jelly beans. I prefer the beans, but after 4 packs of them yesterday I never want to even see or smell anything that looks remotely like a jelly bean. Even saying the word is nauseating me now. You would think that being given permission to eat candy would be a great thing, but not after 4 packs of the damn things.

You know what was mind-blowing? Running through the streets in the middle of Time’s Square being cheered on by the people watching on the side. It’s awesome to think that normally cars pile up bumper to bumper with horns honking, but yesterday the streets were closed so that I could run through them! There is no other time that you ever get to see Time’s Square like that. And yesterday I got to do it!

I think that was somewhere around mile 9 or so. There are mile markers telling you how far you’ve run and how much further you have to go and each time I passed one it wasn’t agonizing thinking about how many more I had to go. Actually, it was almost sad to think that every mile meant that it was that much closer to being over. It was exciting too though thinking about crossing the finish line and seeing Roman and my mom’s face. This was my victory run and I really couldn’t believe that I was doing it. At the last 1/4 of a mile stretch I literally sprinted through the finish line and had to hold back my tears. 10 years ago I was on my way to living a life of desperation and torment, and possibly early death, because all that was important to me was being skinny, but here I was now changing what I once thought was going to be my future and creating my own destiny.

I’ve worked harder than I have ever worked at anything to overcome negative thoughts, emotions, and beliefs, and I am so happy to say that today I am close to conquering myself. This training has taught me more about myself than any therapy has. No matter what difficulties I’m faced with I know that I can overcome it. No one really talks about how exercise can be so empowering, but it’s so much more than building physical strength, it builds strength of mind too. If you want to know the formula for building confidence, conviction, determination, and pride, push yourself to your physical limit. Push yourself until you think that you have nothing left in you and then just push a little further. You’ll see that you’re made up of much more than you think. I beg you to do that for yourself, because until you’ve tried it it’s hard to believe, and your life will be forever changed.

It’s one day after the race and I feel confused. I’ve been on a 12 week journey and now that it’s over I don’t know what to do with myself. There’s no running to prepare for and nothing to expect, so I’m feeling a bit out of it today. But you know what, this 12 week journey was only the beginning of a new life for me. I just signed up for the Brooklyn 1/2 marathon in May and I’m seriously contemplating joining a charity for the real deal NYC Marathon in November. If you’re ready to conquer yourself and experience something life-changing I dare you to join me. I promise that you won’t regret it and I will be there with you every step of the way.

P.S. I just want to thank you, Roman for sticking by me. Had we not started doing our Sunday “family runs” in the park with the dogs I would most likely never had entered this race and I wouldn’t have had one of the most amazing experiences of my life. You always have my back and you made my goal your goal too by acting just as excited as I was about this. It’s a special thing to be able to share your life with someone and I wouldn’t be who I am today without you. As I told you yesterday, I feel like I’m living a fairy tale.

P.P.S. Shilpa – I really couldn’t have done this without you either. We had a little role reversal there – you, my client, forced me, your trainer into running. I definitely would not have entered this race without you and I have to seriously thank you for encouraging me through my hard runs and sticking by my side. I still can’t believe that we met only a year and a half ago. I’ve seen how far you’ve come and I am so so so proud of you. This was a victory run for you too and I teared up a little as we were sprinting to the finish not only thinking about myself, but about you too. You deserve only the best in life and you have proven to yourself that you are capable of anything. Good friends are hard to come by and in all sincerity you are a fabulous friend.

** I just want you all to know that as I reread this post I realize that it doesn’t even come close to what I am feeling or what I experienced yesterday. It’s the best I can do to recreate it though…
*** So sorry that there are no pictures, but I can’t find the cord for the camera. These blisters are forcing me to wear only flips flops, so as soon as it stops pouring I’ll go down to Radio Shack and get a replacement :)

181 Miles Down, Only 4 More To Go!

I cannot believe that this is the last week before my race! It’s been 12 weeks since I started running and it’s amazing to look back and see how far I’ve come. Yes, I’ve been active and fit for the last 10+ years, but whenever you start something new it’s a shock. And new it really was, because although I’ve worked out for a long time I’ve never really taken to running. I preferred other things like Spinning or boot camp to keep my heart rate up, thinking that I’m just not a runner. I categorized myself as “not a runner”. Today though, 181 miles later I can say that I’m definitely a runner and my life is forever changed.

That being said though, I’ll be honest, today was HARD! I mean H-A-R-D! And it was only 2 miles! I’ve run 10 with no problem, so why am I complaining? I can’t be 100% sure what it was exactly, but I do know that my legs are killing me. And they were killing me for the entire 18 minutes it took me to run the damn thing. I couldn’t quite control my joints. It was weird. It was like they were just flopping around and I couldn’t get them to stay in place. As groups of cyclists pedaled by me I was almost embarrassed to look at them. For weeks I’ve felt like a real part of an athletic community, but now I felt ridiculous. Oh, and my left shin felt like it was warning me that if I didn’t let up it would explode. Seriously, I had that image in my head of my leg just exploding all over the place on the pavement. And because my legs weren’t cooperating I had to breath harder to power up the hill, which only made me feel like I wanted to vomit.

That also being said though, I DID NOT QUIT ONCE! I kept telling myself that it’s only 2 miles, it will eventually end, and I’ve run way further than that. I just repeated that in my head like a mantra. Still, I have to be responsible and follow the advice that I’d give to any of my clients and take it a bit easier this week. My body is obviously trying to tell me something and although it’s in my nature to not quit out of some insane need to prove something to myself, I’m going to listen this time and ease up for the last few days before my race. This is very hard for me, because I do not like to feel defeated, but I need to give myself permission to lighten the load. If I don’t then I will only be setting myself up for an injury.

Just because I’m a trainer doesn’t mean that I don’t struggle like the rest of you. I still remember what it was like starting from scratch so many years ago and what I had to do to convince myself that I COULD lose weight, be sane, and learn to eat normally, but it’s also pretty distant. This training has really reminded me of what that feeling is like to start from nothing and to really struggle through the ups and downs of pain, defeat, and fatigue. I feel stronger than I ever have though and it’s only convinced me more that you can really do ANYTHING that you want. I know I can get through anything, but I’m getting a little nervous now that it’s so close to the race. I want to be able to finish strong and know that I gave it my all. So, I’m reaching out to you all and asking you to give me permission to relax a little bit.

And please, if you haven’t already done so, please show your love and support for me by donating to The Fresh Air Fund (they are sponsoring my run). Every little bit counts and every little bit will power me through when I feel like my legs just won’t carry me anymore. I am running as a personal goal, but I will also be running for all of you who are struggling to find your way on your road to success.

166.5 Miles Down, 17.5 More To Go!

I love trying the impossible. I love proving myself wrong of all my doubts. I love pushing myself to the limit and overcoming fear. I just ran 12 miles yesterday and feel like a complete rock star! Wait, not to sound too perfect, I’ll tell you the truth.

10 miles felt like a good distance (I know, that sounds crazy enough!), but those last 2 miles were really pushing it and my legs felt like I was carrying 12 tons of lead up a mammoth-sized hill like my life depended on it. Armed with my arsenal of water, Sports Beans and Cliff Shot Blocks I did it though and felt like nothing could stop me. I felt like a superhero must feel when he discovers his superpowers for the first time. My running partner, Shilpa was like, “we have to keep moving or else I’m going to throw-up”, and I thought to myself, “that was awesome, I can’t believe how great I feel”.

On the way back home is when it all came crashing down. I knew that my legs were moving, but I couldn’t get there quick enough. Every step felt like an accomplishment. But finally after an agonizing 5 long blocks I made it through the front door. Roman, Billiam, and Ozzie enthusiastically greeted me and the second I bent down to pet the dogs is when my bubble really burst. I could barely stand back up, and when Roman asked me how I felt I could barely muster a pathetic “like a rock star”. I definitely didn’t sound like rock star or look like a rock star at that moment, but I still felt like one. Then the nausea and chills settled in and I know I should have eaten something, but I just couldn’t bring myself to swallow anything. I sat at my dining room table looking like a beaten dumpster diving raccoon.

Walking down the stairs to the living room I was more like a feeble grandma with a walker than an athlete. I could only walk down sideways, holding on to the banister, one leg at a time. A throbbing pain shot through my left shin and another throb shot trough my right hip. I just ran 12 miles and now I needed one of those Hover Rounds and the chair that brings you up and down the stairs. I will tell you this though, About an hour later I finally ate something. And I didn’t just eat anything. I ate something that I would never in a million years eat. I could have had a salad or a healthy wrap or something, but I just burned 1200 calories (a full day of calories!), so I had a mama jama sized peanut butter and jelly sandwich and a 1/4 of an apple cinnamon muffin. For many of you this is no big deal, but you should know that for me, this is a huge accomplishment and turn of events. After 12 miles, some major nausea and chills, a yummy pb & j sandwich, and some muffin Roman and I took the dogs for a mile and a half walk.

So, rock star, you betcha! I’m such a freaking rock star that I even got dolled up and put on heels to go hang out with our friends later that night and didn’t come home until 1:30am. Ain’t nothin’ gonna stop me! And, I’m on day 7 of my 100 calorie or less night-time snack and going strong.

Here’s my secret: It all comes down to sheer mental will. None of this would have been possible had I not BELIEVED I was going to do it. Once I committed to it there was no going back and I wasn’t going to give up, because that would mean that I let myself down. So, I invite you to RISE UP and commit to yourself to do something that you’ve always wanted to do, but have put off. Anything that will make you feel accomplished and successful.

Throughout my recovery I honestly think that this journey I’ve been on for the past 10 weeks has been one of the most pivotal moments for me, and I have proven to myself how strong I am. I will never be that broken girl I once was and nothing will ever stop me again. Rise up.

I’m A Failure

Oh my gosh, I thought I was going to die! 11 miles today and each every single damn one made me want to scream. It’s pretty slushy out in the park, my usual training ground, so instead I went to the Y to run on a treadmill like a hamster. Whenever I look at a packed gym, with people running to nowhere, I always get the image that they’re just powering the air conditioning. Not a bad idea actually…

From the moment I started running my knee hurt and it didn’t go away the entire time. I tried watching TV, which worked until I checked how many miles I’d run so far. I thought I was 6 miles in, but I was only 2.5! That seriously messed with my mind. I had to quiet it down again by trying to focus on my breathing. I had read in one of my personal training magazines that the lungs are just like any other muscle, and if we don’t fully use them they will atrophy, just like your biceps or any other muscle in your body will with inactivity. Plus, it helps put you “in the zone”. I tried breathing in for 2, holding for 2, and then out for 2, which helped for a bit, but soon after my mind began wandering again and I wanted to kill someone.

I had to keep thinking that I could technically stop at any time, but I knew that if I did I would be mad at myself for not just sticking it out. I knew it was all in my head. Last week I had an amazing run and it was only 1 mile less than this week, so I could psych myself up to finish this week too. Eventually it has to end, right?

Then I tried the TV again, and that worked for about 10 minutes until I couldn’t handle even having headphones in my ears. Everything was irritating me. Someone got on the treadmill next to me and they smelled like those old apartment buildings that smell like 4 different types of bad cooking. Great, now I have knee pain, I’m irritated, I’m sweating like it’s going out of style, and this woman who smells like old meatballs and fish is running next to me.

Ok, only 2 more miles to go. The longest 2 miles ever and I so wanted to quit. My running partner had already finished by this time and I sped the treadmill up even faster to finish too. I couldn’t tell if it was my mind or my muscles that were failing me, but I wasn’t going to let either of them get me. It took everything out of me to finish. I ran and I ran and I ran and I ran and I ran for what seemed like forever, but finally the treadmill slowed down, signaling to me that I finished.

Sweat soaked my entire shirt and I couldn’t tell you what my name was at that moment. I could barely even step off the treadmill my hips were so tight. And my head was swimming, drunk on endorphins. At that moment, If I found out I won the lottery I don’t think I would have made the effort to do anything about it. I hobbled home, looking like a wounded animal. All wanted to do was just lie down and curl into a ball.

Now I’m home and I don’t think I’m going to move from this chair the entire night if I can help it. I’m completely spent, but I feel like a rock star.

There’s good failure and bad failure. Bad failure is when you hope to succeed and don’t because you didn’t try, good failure is when you don’t stop until you fail. I can honestly say that today I feel like the best failure.

I'm A Failure

Oh my gosh, I thought I was going to die! 11 miles today and each every single damn one made me want to scream. It’s pretty slushy out in the park, my usual training ground, so instead I went to the Y to run on a treadmill like a hamster. Whenever I look at a packed gym, with people running to nowhere, I always get the image that they’re just powering the air conditioning. Not a bad idea actually…

From the moment I started running my knee hurt and it didn’t go away the entire time. I tried watching TV, which worked until I checked how many miles I’d run so far. I thought I was 6 miles in, but I was only 2.5! That seriously messed with my mind. I had to quiet it down again by trying to focus on my breathing. I had read in one of my personal training magazines that the lungs are just like any other muscle, and if we don’t fully use them they will atrophy, just like your biceps or any other muscle in your body will with inactivity. Plus, it helps put you “in the zone”. I tried breathing in for 2, holding for 2, and then out for 2, which helped for a bit, but soon after my mind began wandering again and I wanted to kill someone.

I had to keep thinking that I could technically stop at any time, but I knew that if I did I would be mad at myself for not just sticking it out. I knew it was all in my head. Last week I had an amazing run and it was only 1 mile less than this week, so I could psych myself up to finish this week too. Eventually it has to end, right?

Then I tried the TV again, and that worked for about 10 minutes until I couldn’t handle even having headphones in my ears. Everything was irritating me. Someone got on the treadmill next to me and they smelled like those old apartment buildings that smell like 4 different types of bad cooking. Great, now I have knee pain, I’m irritated, I’m sweating like it’s going out of style, and this woman who smells like old meatballs and fish is running next to me.

Ok, only 2 more miles to go. The longest 2 miles ever and I so wanted to quit. My running partner had already finished by this time and I sped the treadmill up even faster to finish too. I couldn’t tell if it was my mind or my muscles that were failing me, but I wasn’t going to let either of them get me. It took everything out of me to finish. I ran and I ran and I ran and I ran and I ran for what seemed like forever, but finally the treadmill slowed down, signaling to me that I finished.

Sweat soaked my entire shirt and I couldn’t tell you what my name was at that moment. I could barely even step off the treadmill my hips were so tight. And my head was swimming, drunk on endorphins. At that moment, If I found out I won the lottery I don’t think I would have made the effort to do anything about it. I hobbled home, looking like a wounded animal. All wanted to do was just lie down and curl into a ball.

Now I’m home and I don’t think I’m going to move from this chair the entire night if I can help it. I’m completely spent, but I feel like a rock star.

There’s good failure and bad failure. Bad failure is when you hope to succeed and don’t because you didn’t try, good failure is when you don’t stop until you fail. I can honestly say that today I feel like the best failure.

Thank You Sir, May I Have Another

That’s exactly my thought as I rounded the corner, finishing my 10 mile run today. After last week’s legs-feel-like-lead-in-molasses 9 mile run I thought getting through today would be impossible, but this incredibly turned out to be my best run yet. From the moment I woke up I could feel a difference. I just felt so relaxed. There was no anxious anticipation of what was to come, but I felt an excitement about the idea of completing this challenge. It was one of those “I can do anything” days. My shins were nagging me a bit, but it didn’t matter.

10 miles equals exactly 3 loops around Prospect Park. Normally after the first loop I’d have the dread of 2 more to go, but not today. The first loop only revved me up more and I couldn’t wait to round the next one and then the next. Every song that came on gave me a different beat to run to and I couldn’t help but almost sing along. Then a little pebble came flying out of nowhere and hit me in the face. Who cares though, right? It didn’t matter. Then I felt a stitch in my side, but I massaged it away. And then I felt a twinge in my knee, but I just imagined it to be the color blue until I willed it away. It felt so great being out there with all the serious cyclists and runners. Mile after mile after mile after mile we’d bump into each other and give a little nod of acknowledgment, or maybe encouragement. Some people were out just strolling along with their dogs and each time I ran around the loop I’d bump into them again, only they were just a 1/2 mile further than before and I was 3 miles closer to finishing.

Oh, and I ran into one of my clients that I hadn’t seen in a while and I actually heard the words “I’m on mile 9, one more to go” come out of my mouth. Never in my wildest dreams would I have imagined this would be me. I ran on with a little smile on my face, just so proud of myself.

Ok, so here’s my epiphany for today – You absolutely must think positively if you are going to succeed in anything. This run encompassed everything I was talking about in my blog this week. I practically willed myself into having an amazing run today. Even when I felt sore I kept on going, because I wasn’t going to let myself down. I realized something else too. This is the first time in my life that I’m exercising without obsessing about how many calories I burned, how many calories I have to eat, what I’m going to do tomorrow, etc., etc. Through this training it’s never occurred to me not to go on a run one day. Sure I’ve felt dread, but I always know that I’m going to go and feel great after. And guess what, my body composition is changing and I’ve lost a few inches! I always say that once you stop obsessing about your weight that’s exactly when it starts to come off. Now I’m proof of that. Plus, I just cleaned the entire house. I think I earned that ice cream sundae now, right?

Conquering Defeat

My legs felt like springs today. No pain, strain, nothing! Effortless and I can’t believe it, because I’ve had major IT band and shin issues for the past few weeks. Maybe it’s the warm humid air in Miami. I don’t know. But what I do know is that I’m in a fuzzy lalaland right now. Just finished my 7 mile run without my running partner and I feel great. It was hard to get started this morning, but it’s only 10:30am, I’m done, and now I have the whole day ahead of me.

I finished in a little bit over an hour, so I should be good for the 3 hour cut-off at the race (they pick you up and bring you to the finish line if you take over 3).

I can’t believe how far I’ve come. When I first started training I thought 3 miles was a lot, but now it’s a piece of cake. I’ve been learning a lot about myself too. That it’s not about how many calories you’ve eaten, what size you are, how heavy you are, but about your capabilities and your strength. Strength of body, but especially your mind. If you can power through discomfort and your mind talking you out of finishing, than you are stronger, braver, and more able than any skinny person out there. I take pride in my strength and my accomplishments. I’m doing this for me and no one else. I have nothing to prove to anyone else, only me. I can’t wait to meet my husband and puppies at the finish line and feel the exhileration of conquering any weaknesses, doubts, defeat, perfectionism, but especially thoughts of failure.

Please Help Me!

I’m making my first attempt at running a 1/2 marathon and I’m being sponsored by the Fresh Air Fund. My goal is to raise $1,000 to help send an underpriviliged kid to summer camp. This is a life-changing experience for a kid in need. Please help motivate my running by contributing to this cause. I’m only in week 3 of training, with 9 more to go, working my way up to 13.1 miles, so any support you show me will help power me through my runs. Thanks!

http://freshair.kintera.org/faf/donorReg/donorPledge.asp?ievent=314023&lis=0&kntae314023=A7047416826A48F0B92DD033D737A8DE